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· Back away..slowly.
Joined
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2,127 Posts
My car would say one of several things: "Pleeease let me die!!" or "I just want to be loved!!" or "Pleasse fix me up, I know I'm ugly now, but give me a chance, I'll be good to you!!" or "I hate you too." lmao. :p
 

· Registered
Joined
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83 Posts
"WASH ME YOU FUKING MOTHER FUCKER !"
"I NEED SOME FUCKING NEW TIRES!"
"WTF IS THAT CHEAP OIL INSIDE ME?"
"I CANT TAKE THIS ANY MORE! GIVE ME SOME GOOD GAS!"
and so on.

for my happyness, nissan engines are resistents to bad treatments=]
 

· Locked and Loaded
Joined
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4,098 Posts
"arg, i can only take so much abuse"
"WASH ME NOW, BITCH!"
"get my headliner fixed too!"
"dont make me look ugly bastid"
 

· I want my B14!!!!
Joined
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254 Posts
FUnny how my friend and I were discussing this :p

"Those shoes weigh too much- get me new ones"

"I AM NOT A STICK!"

"I do not handle like an EVO!"

"Hurry up and get my clothes on (the kit)"

"I should have been SR powered"

"Those FMIC are sexy. Get me one"

"Get that pic of your old car off my dash. Your sportscar is dead- let it go"

"I love drinking the finest (Premium gas only)"

"That box in my butt is heavy (my sub)"

"I used to look like THAT?! (when I see other GLEs)"
:p
 

· Destroyer of worlds.
Joined
·
2,656 Posts
starting it up...

in the morning mine would say "fuck off! i dont wanna get up! you dont need school anyway. more sleep."

at noon it would say "fuck off! i dont wanna get up, it's too hot out, and the sun is bright...and i dont like soccer moms"

in the evening it would say "fuck off! i dont wanna get up, i've been driving your fat ass around all day and i need more sleep"

196k and cars start to get grumpy like old men, oh well.
 

· Banned
Joined
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6,855 Posts
well ill be a monkeys uncle......mine does talk to me.

also;
"hurry up and paint the other 3 wheels you lazy tool bag!"
"i want a real sterio, not that $30 POS you got a bestbuy"
"please clean all this dog hair out"
"!!!!!!I DEMAND YOU CLEAN MY ENGINE BAY!!!!!!!"

"fix that crack in my header please, i promise ill stop bogging"
 

· Spin those tires up!
Joined
·
205 Posts
Replace my damn cv axle
Why do you smoke tire everytime you take off.
Kill that bird its shitting on me!
fix that exaust leak i sound like crap!
Turn your stereo down YOU will rattle me APART!
 

· pay your rent!
Joined
·
1,395 Posts
mine would say "quit running me into shit! (half asleep morning comute), fix my rusting rear quarter panel, fix my leaky valve guids, replace my clutch, and for the love of god fix my damn rock hard worn out every bump feels 12" deep suspention!


oh and learn how to spell!!"
 

· g33k/gamer/QR nerd
Joined
·
462 Posts
mine would say:

'what the fuck i look like a truck get me some coilovers bitch!'
'why'd you use that brush at the car wash, it left scars you mother fucka!'
'Im glad you warm me up 5 mins before i get driven.... asshole'
'Im an auto not a manny so quit shifting into neutral at every stop damn it!'

finally
'why did you let that black kid drive me? fuckin broke a control arm you bastard when i got slammed on that curb going 40! trade me in now! i hate you!"
 

· bitter old man
Joined
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1,547 Posts
"Lose some weight, you Fat Bastard! Sixty pounds will be a good start..."
 
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