Hey, Nate. Your symptoms still strike me as really familiar. One of the worst times my car wouldn't start, I had done all of the same things as you...took everything apart, changed plugs, changed electrical parts, confirmed good air/spark/fuel but still nothing. It would crank just fine but wouldn't fire. I broke down and went to a dealer. They said it was flooded so badly there was fuel in the oil pan. They got it running for the cost of an oil change, some spark plugs, and an hour's labor.
The car was out of warranty. Unless there was some sort of recall, I don't think they would've done anything with my timing chain and only bill me for the oil change, plugs, and labor. They had been pretty good to me previously, so I think they were being straight up about what they found.
Let us know how you make out.
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